Seeking Therapy and Beating the Hesitancy of Starting

By Stephanie Horejs, LCPC

Have you ever found yourself feeling lost? Or feeling like the weight of the world is on your shoulders? Or maybe you have exciting news and want to share with someone new. Or work on some personal goals. Are you finding that reaching out to friends, family, or loved ones just is not doing it for you?

Have you thought about or even asked yourself "Do I need to talk to someone about this?" but then immediately thought "No! I can get through this myself."

These questions and moments have entered many minds and are more universal than you might expect. Another commonality of “talking to someone” about any salient event in life is the feeling of hesitation.

It is completely normal to feel hesitant about beginning therapy. Actually, a lot of people battling the question of starting therapy think about it for quite some time before booking an appointment.

What Causes Hesitation About Therapy?

Hesitation, in relation to starting therapy, has many facets including:

• stigma

• shame

• fear

• mistrust

• uncertainty

• accessibility

Stigma

Stigma is very much still alive when it comes to mental health, unfortunately. While mental health is becoming more recognized and understood, there are still many trains of thought dismissing it entirely.

Especially those who are in the helping professions with the mindset “I don’t need help” or “I shouldn’t need help”—there comes a time where even the “helper” will need to call upon someone for assistance.

And to that, a reminder:

therapy is confidential — no one has to know.

Shame

Shame can manifest in various ways regarding therapy. However, therapy is not for the “broken,” the “weak,” or “the crazy.”

Therapy is:

• a space to learn how to care for yourself in a deeper way

• a place to explore the aspects of yourself that you question, dislike, or even the aspects that you enjoy about yourself

Telling yourself to be strong and self-sufficient can cause immense pressure and further inner turmoil. However, strength also means knowing when it is time to ask for support and also allowing yourself to receive said support.

Fear and Mistrust

Fear and mistrust are absolutely understandable. Speaking with a complete stranger you looked up on the internet and being vulnerable with them does not sound like a particularly enjoyable activity.

Finding a good fit for you is key to combat this initial fear. Feeling heard, feeling supported, and feeling respected are some crucial points in a good fit.

Finding the right fit also speaks true if you are someone who has had a previous experience that was unfavorable. Trust takes time and a good therapist will walk alongside you at your pace and provide a safe place for you.

After all, you know you better than the therapist you decide to choose to work with.

Uncertainty

Uncertainty about therapy typically is a large deterrent—no one likes going into things blindly. Ask the question to expand your understanding.

Therapy is not a place where you get told what to do or how to change. Therapy can be:

• a place for decompression and reflection

• for exploration and processing

• for collaboration in efforts to seek what aligns with you as you walk through your personal journey of life

  
  

Accessibility

Accessibility including cost, insurance coverage, and availability can make therapy feel daunting and out of reach.

The frustration here is not uncommon; however, there are more options than you may expect to make therapy more accessible once you begin searching.

Final Thoughts

It is absolutely okay to take your time.

Asking for support is not an indication there is something wrong with you.

Asking for help simply means you are ready to invest in yourself.